• aeronmelon@lemm.ee
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    9 months ago

    Wakes up and looks at the clock

    “Oh, it’s only 7:18. Since my alarm is set to 7:20, I’ll just shut it off now and let myself rest for a couple of minutes.”

    opens eyes again

    10:45

    • madcaesar@lemmy.world
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      9 months ago

      Plot twist, it was Tuesday 7:18am and Wednesday 10:45pm!

      Also, your kidneys are gone.

  • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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    9 months ago

    You gotta just stand up. Even if you walk around with your eyes barely open, it’s better than laying back down. Waking up in the middle of a shower is a heck of a lot better than waking up late for work

    • chaorace@lemmy.sdf.org
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      9 months ago

      Oh, “just stand up” you say? Wow, after that I could “just get everything important done” and “just make everyone happy”.

      I have a better idea: I’m gonna go back to sleep.

      • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        I don’t know if it’ll help you, but I envision myself as having two mes: Sleep Me and Awake Me. Sleep Me is an asshole who’ll ruin my life just to stay asleep for as long as possible. He fights tooth and nail to keep Awake Me from taking control of my body. ”I’m gonna go back to sleep" is Sleep You talking. They’re trying their hardest to convince Awake You that you can’t possibly stand up until Sleep You has had their fill of sleep, but it’s not like “just be happy” or “just pay attention–” you can control your legs!

        • chaorace@lemmy.sdf.org
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          9 months ago

          Sleep Me killed Awake Me and now wears his skin in a pale mockery of conscious thought. Sleep Me’s true name is ADD.

        • kraftpudding@lemmy.world
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          9 months ago

          Can I? Often I seriously lie in bed, mentally going through the motion of getting up step by step the whole time convinced I’m doing it, only to notice seconds later I have not moved at all.

          I want to so badly, but unless there’s the time pressure of having to get up or there’ll be bad consequences, I just… can’t

      • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        That’s Sleep You talking! FUCK Sleep You! They don’t give a shit about you, or your success in life, or your mental health. They exist solely to make sure you sleep as much as possible and they’re given way too much power to achieve that goal

    • Shieldtoad@sh.itjust.works
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      9 months ago

      My one cat usually sleeps on top of me so I can’t just stand up. And when he isn’t sleeping on me and the alarm goes off, he’ll come in running for snuggles and make me fall asleep again.

      • starman2112@sh.itjust.works
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        9 months ago

        Cats are truly our greatest enemy in life. My Athena doesn’t much care for Awake Me, but as soon as I fall asleep she wants to be as close as possible. If I didn’t grab my phone, I’d be back to sleep cuddling her as I type this

  • Godnroc@lemmy.world
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    9 months ago

    I set up some smart bulbs and music after I turn off my alarm. Having light and sound stimulation has prevented me from falling back asleep even when I’m so tired I cannot keep my eyes open.

  • DavidGarcia@feddit.nl
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    9 months ago

    It would be quite smart if your phone started ringing if you haven’t picked it up in 10 min or so after shutting off your alarm.

    • Rootiest@lemm.ee
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      9 months ago

      Sleep as Android has this along with a ton of other wake up helpers like QRcode/NFC tag scanning to stop the alarm, math problems, etc.

      I found the math worked well at first but I apparently got too good at solving them in my sleep.

      I put an NFC tag in the bathroom which requires me to get out of bed and go into the bathroom to stop the alarm. That’s usually enough to get me to stay up

      They also have various CAPTCHA tests, one that requires you to hold your phone and spin around, one that requires you to put the phone up to a light source, and other such things. I’m sure you can find an effective solution that works for you

  • ElephantInTheRoom@lemmy.ml
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    9 months ago

    That’s why I placed my alarm on the other side of the room. This way I have to get my lazy ass out of the bed to turn it off. And then I’m awake anyway.

  • guyrocket@kbin.social
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    9 months ago

    The clock app on Android is seriously great software. I have myself playing guitar to wake me up and have trained myself to snooze if I am still in bed.

    Now I just need to go to bed on time…

  • XTornado@lemmy.ml
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    9 months ago

    Me working from home: Well… I only have a meeting at 10… at worst I stay longer in the afternoon.