Please don’t reply with a pithy rebuttal.
I’m not like the other white guys. (yes I am, I’m literally just as racist)
Hi! Few things to start off with =] Yes I added you because you're a female gamer, 'tis an awesome thing to see! I'm Brian. Don't be intimidated, but I'm not a stereotypical guy. If anything, I'll be the one in the kitchen =D.Don’t be intimidated, but I’m not a stereotypical guy. If anything, I’ll be the one in the kitchen =D.
“Hey baby, I’d never tell you to stay in the kitchen, 'cause I’m always eating out. Wiiiink.”
I’m not like other white guys, I’m also downwardly mobile
White men are scary.
Dude is like a sentient fedora
putting the sentient fedora on at reddit hogwarts to determine what dumbass subreddit i get shunted into
“Hmm, oh yes you will fit right in at r/f7u12”
“Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuck”“you belong in r/traa”
“Wait, what?”
Can we reserve this magical hat for the fedora-tippers?
what is it about the worst to read, parse, & imitate forms of writing in what can still be called ‘modern’ english that possesses internet assholes to think it can in some way prove seductive?
by all means it can be -funny- to adapt an horrifically out-of-date patois, for a joke, but these people seem to believe that sounding like a fucking highwayman would in any way endear them to, anyone? like people are still casually reading Thackery and just waiting for someone to come along talking in that dialect?
and what’s worse, it’s an imagined version of it, a modernized, bizarre way of speaking that’d be fit for a disney film trying to wring the style without challenging an audience of children. a real 18th century book (or gentlesir) does not say “melanated”. they say a slur.
I think it’s the inauthenticity of it that annoys me the most. A guy would refer to himself as a gentleman, not a sir. That’s just stupid. What are you, a baronet or something?
when it came to pass that I wasn’t melanated, she grew aggressive and angered
He said the
word, didn’t he?That was probably the clunkiest sentence in a goldmine of clunky, flowery sentences.
When it came to pass
When it occurred…
that I wasn’t melanated
…that I’m not black
I wonder when exactly his non-blackness happened and why someone was upset with him during that event.
Honestly this is peak Redditor thesaurus abuse.
I don’t have anything against big words but if you’re going to reach for complex grammar and sesquipedal phrasing then at least make sure that it’s actually within your grasp before you do it or you come off looking like a pretentious fool.
Verily, my veracity for verbosity is verboten and verifiably vainglorious
Vuck off
you never go full
god that was painful to read
Have a phenomenal day.
There’s a lot of things I hate about Reddit loving neckbeard losers but the whole sarcastically polite thing trying to signal that they feel too far above you to be rude to you but they’re being sarcastic about it revealing the extent to which they don’t actually feel above you actually they feel kind of hurt and resentful but you were just being a normal human and they feel aggrieved by that… that whole psychic mess they all have is maybe what I hate the most.
Your Caucasity
Damn I thought that type of dude died out in '10s
I would say this has to be some dude just fucking around, but also I’ve met mfers like this in real life
