Proposal: I think we (Hexbear and Lemmygrad) should make/organize a third space or collective of spaces for ““non-political,”” intentionally non-stressful topics and activities.

Long likely autistic- and I say this not as a bad thing but rather I'm a certain way, and then also currently my brain is a certain way though it's not bad- uh but anyways it's a spiel- explanation of reasoning

I’m rather new to Hexbear, but on the 'grad (and on Hexbear as well) as well as other chats- I think we all have noticed, and probably felt as well, a great deal of alienation in the broader society, as well as the stressors of the 'grad/Hexbear being among the few truly and primarily decent spaces online that get things, as well.

And we’ve all also experienced how it is like dealing with ghoulishness prevalent elsewhere, and probably also seeing others banned or being banned ourselves from reddit as well as other spaces, having our communities dismantled. I imagine between this and the alienation- it has taken a toll on many of our lives.

The Hexbear/Lemmygrad formats also have their limitations; while I’d not call them an org, the truth is that almost everyone needs a breather from as well as life and social inclusion outside of such spaces that focus on political issues, effortposting, and struggle sessions. My point here being that it sucks, when two of the only “truly decent” spaces online which get it are also often spaces that can take quite a bit of energy and mental availability to fully participate in. And it sucks even more that, for many of us, being largely alienated from other spaces outside of these inherently deeply political (not that anything is “not political”) spaces, we might have withdrawn from liberal-infested spaces (online and IRL) that previously held other activities with little stress nor effort involved- from gaming, fandoms, music, and all sorts of other spaces.

Frankly it sucks that, in the current political climate, being driven into the Fediverse and elsewhere, we’ve lost these mostly peaceful, chill spaces. And it sucks that even in the Fediverse (as well as elsewhere), due to our political understanding and discussion, our communities are actively- well, persecuted is the honest word.

I think that it’s about time that we (Hexbear and Lemmygrad) made a third, mostly disconnected space (and probably with the intent of not having direct connections beyond vetting/etc with the processes of Hexbear and the 'grad) for non-political socializing. We should have this disconnected space with whatever distance is deemed best (open for discussion, I’m not really a opsec person and have decent caution, that’s about that generally) from Hexbear and Lemmygrad, but from there we should be able to branch out with wholly ““non-political”” social activites and chilling perhaps even in other spaces.

Also if anyone can word this better than me (I’m generally already likely/almost definitely deeply autistic- and I don’t say that as a bad thing, but it also is a certain way as I imagine this reads- but my mind is somewhere weird but not bad right now) I say please go for it. Hell, make another post about this. TBH I also don’t really want to be at the center of such developments though I’m open to being a part of making it and amongst those starting it- but basically knowing myself while I tend to have these kinds of ideas and also when I’m in a good space in life tend to get people together, etc- so far I’ve never had such energy sustainably (working on it) and I’m just a hot wreck/dumpster fire in so many ways, and NOT someone who knows much about the any of the things necessary for this (if people wanted to figure out a VC or discord or Steam group or whatnot I could probably handle though).

Needless to say, I think we could all benefit greatly from this. Personally regardless I’m likely going to at least try to assemble friends/people I know are chill both from IRL and here for my own interests, if we don’t create something akin to this ourselves (but I think that both the Hexbear and Lemmygrad communities show a blatant and extreme need for this amongst many of us- myself included).

Ideas that come to mind for instance that could be incredibly cool- voice chats with karaoke, trans voice training, gaming, etc. VRchat or expanding into MMOs or other game communities (having our own guilds or some shit, not that I play any MMOs rn). Promoting, collaborating with, enjoying, etc. our own chill creative works and sites/etc on other platforms (while not having it connected to our politicking on Hexbear or the Grad)- Twitch, X/formerly Twitter (always get a kick out of saying that admittedly) Youtube, Instagram, Pinterest, TikTok, etc. or perhaps better alternatives (probably what I’m suggesting is also terrible opsec and I’m sure that crowd will rightfully dunk on this take).

We already have something similar in the TV/Movies watching channels in Hexbear, and I know there’s Hexcraft or whatever the server name is. Why not expand out further yet still (and also provide a non-chud space for people to take a breather and just live)?

Also- since many comrades on both instances and elsewhere are struggling for the reasons listed, especially in these times… this could help us all just hype each other up (“apolitically”) and help us all be the best comrades we can be. Self-care through group care and all that is hella praxis.

Additionally, if it needs further explaining- my comments elsewhere which led to this train of thought (only my comments, so no worries) from other chats from Hexbear and a friend from the 'grad

actually. hm. while I’d hesitate to take a leading role in it as I’m a hot mess as an understatement and rarely sustainable (want to work on being better) I should see about pushing for some hexbear/grad chill non-pol (mostly non-pol) space. was talking in tracha about it tbh non-pol as in “”““non-political””" as bullshit as that concept is, but basically because struggle sessions and/or getting infiltrated or etc sucks

while I never sustain them (because I’m a dumpster fire lol… working on stopping that cycle) I do get people together sometimes when in an upswing (energetic) phase think it’s def needed esp in these times

tbh got to talking w another friend and gonna see about proposing and pushing for a third (hangout/“”“non-pol”“” or low-pol/also less stress) space, perhaps between Hex and the Grad and whoever is not a lib ghoul from elsewhere since sometimes some of the rest of the fediverse and the internet, I suppose, are good people (though they aren’t sending their best) lol gonna write up a proposal or some sort tho don’t think I want to be central to it as while I can be good at sorting these things out sometimes I’m also a dumpster fire and unsustainable historically but we should make some sorta space. in the fediverse, maybe even outside it o hm that wasn’t the whatchamacallit uh crossout thingy like as in, idk. could have voice training, vrchat if anyone does, gaming, karaoke, IK there’s already the tv watching etc spaces… tbh also if it were separate enough ish could even hypothetically be “less” (still probs best to be at least considerably) worried about opsec or could even utilize easier/etc platforms with vetting from the grad/hex like for instance steam groups, twitch, discord, hell if I know what else. mmos etc. because by having the political stuff elsewhere (still connected and whatnot and absolutely necessary, but I think so are some such- idk more chill spaces for comrades to chill) it becomes just a whole lot less- risky as well granted I ain’t one of those who is all 👌about that opsec, I have decent caution and that’s about it. but could be discussed since def some people (myself) would want to use such platforms probs also

like for instance, saw a reddit (acquaintance? well someone I messaged a bit once, trans commie who sadly I never recced to come to the grad or hex, but who had moved from the US to China) was banned recently. no way to contact we oughta get some non-pol spaces which are tied adjacently to the old pol spaces

if that makes sense. no more getting swept under the rug, until other platforms are fully adopted and have all the means we can use what exists (separately and alongside hex and grad)

Anyways, please consider. Also obligatory Aftonsparv because I still want them as an emote

    • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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      5 days ago

      As the one who is pushing the idea- on one hand, pretty much che-laugh

      Though on the other hand, it’s simply because the political spaces (which would still exist and which would be ideally part of the vetting process/exist as part of a somewhat-framework) will naturally be stomped on when trying to congregate in certain platforms, and also because constantly being in the environment in- well particularly Hexbear perhaps, I feel the Grad is somehow more conversational despite the fact we’re mostly effortposting- but uh, is also frankly very unhealthy, probably?

  • CriticalResist8@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 days ago

    With federation you can easily deploy an instance and have it federate only with hexbear and lemmygrad. Then turn off registrations on the instance, and that way only lemmygrad and hexbear can ever interact with it.

  • m532@lemmygrad.ml
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    5 days ago

    With what happened after hexbears admin team suddenly got replaced with a bunch of wreckers, this might be necessary indeed.

    I looked at their modlog and almost their whole admin team got replaced and then a few days later they started banning everyone.

    • GlueBear [they/them] @lemmygrad.ml
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      4 days ago

      Got banned from the em POC comm for my “repulsive racism” of stating that poc can be racist to other POC and that class is just as important as race.

      I have never posted in that comm.

        • GlueBear [they/them] @lemmygrad.ml
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          3 days ago

          I commented on other’s threads, but I didn’t actually submit a post to that comm. That’s what I meant.

          Edit: additionally, not to be that person, but my pronouns are visible. I’d appreciate it if you would respect them by not addressing me as “lad.”

      • Burningmeatstick@lemmygrad.ml
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        4 days ago

        I absolutely agree btw, as someone of color myself other poc can be racist to other poc, ie African Americans, Latinos, Asian and even racist within the so called branch they belong to.

        • GlueBear [they/them] @lemmygrad.ml
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          3 days ago

          Site mods literally just want to call people crackers and blame the whole election on white people, nvm that so many POC are going after each other.

          So them trying to rebrand the site to be “more serious” to me is just funny. It’s a site for shit posters and memes, if they’re serious about discussion they shouldn’t ban people for wrong think.

          Edit: I should say this: I am also a POC and made that known several times including in the post that got me banned. Adds to the absurdity of the claim of “gross racism” on my part.

          But hey at least they somewhat acknowledge that POC can be racist to each other, I guess.

          Edit2: I got banned from the whole site lol, that place is a sad joke.

    • DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml
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      5 days ago

      Wow, just saw that. That is very worrying. “Random” bans and bans mocking people for being too active on the site? And getting rid of some of the most active coms on the site? Hexbear is fucked if these new mods are going to be power tripping like this.

    • sevenapples@lemmygrad.ml
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      4 days ago

      Is there a write up or discussion about this?Didn’t notice it, but I don’t visit hexbear a lot

      edit: nvm, saw the other post on /c/comradeship and followed the links. what a mess

      • m532@lemmygrad.ml
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        4 days ago

        I think I figured it out now

        While the rogue admin was powertripping, their resident wrecker created reactionary alts trying to frame the powertripping admin as even more reactionary

        But the rogue admin is now gone (I think she was pissed about being posted in their version of SRS) and the wrecker is finally banned forever

        While all this was going on, another admin decided to do le funni and banned themself (accidentally misgendering themself while doing it and making it look like there was a third wrecker, making it all even worse)

        Edit: that other admin was an accomplice of the powertripping one, so there was is actually really a third wrecker

  • propter_hog [any, any]@hexbear.net
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    5 days ago

    Is this a reaction to the death of the _tank comms? Not calling this reactionary or anything; I, for one, am in favor of an apolitical space. This last election cycle has left me really tired.

    • Apolitical is not a real thing, there can be politicaly nutral where a space does not care about polotics, or there can be a space without politics as the main focus, but there cannot be a space devoid of politics. What most apolitical spaces become is liberal to some kind because that is the background of society, and that would not be a welcome place. As for places without polotics as a driving force we have a few, I think most notably is birds, however we also have a mostly dead one I run about the show Futurama, so they exist but they are distictly not apolitical.

    • 201dberg@lemmygrad.ml
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      4 days ago

      Can someone explain why the dunk tank was racist or reactionary or whatever? I don’t know the context behind why this was such a big deal. Is it because of the actual content that was being posted there? Like “dunking” on reactionary shit is still showing reactionary shit in some form? Or is the name historically bad in some way?

    • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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      5 days ago

      Not in reaction to the death of the dunk comms whatsoever, tbh (though if anything, the dunk comms were a part of the- probably somewhat bad or unhealthy and stressing vibe of Hexbear/Grad culture/experience that this is supposed to provide a chud-free alternative to. In the sense that always focusing on chuds’ terrible takes, or seeing them up and remembering how shit things are sometimes- sucks like hell.

      It leaves me tired, as well. It left someone else tired that was chatting to, or left many actually in hindsight. Which is what led to my proposing this. Like- we’re all(?) dealing with the same heavy shit, now admittedly I have a lot of that dunk culture and general brainworms (as well as cool based gossip/not being opposed to being a non problematic bully to shitlibs aspects) myself- also this doesn’t have to and shouldn’t be centered around me (imo people should probably also grab their own friends from here for such spaces as well as collaborating on a main chill comm).

      Basically- the election season, or even prior to that- the past few years, has been tiring. I think it’s safe to say we need a (vetted) space separate and the healthier I get, the more selective (not that I’d leave, this is literally one of if not the best space online) my interactions here get, somewhat? Because while my beliefs and actions have not changed, I also begin prioritizing my own development and mental health to become the best comrade I can be if that makes sense?

      Sorry for the spiel but yeah rat-salute-2

  • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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    5 days ago

    Also thoughts are, maybe I’ll start streaming or something in due time (won’t tie whatever I do to here lmaooooo though… also because on some levels I just ain’t 100% with here- who is after all, we’re leftists). (also, ah woops, meant not 100% on hex- well disaster scatterbrain as usual myself)

    But basically: if one thinks about this, while having good mental health and chilling with comrades is praxis, presenting an approachable entry to leftism or to recognizing and tangibly pursuing basic decency and all that jazz is also praxis (Hex and the Grad are nice but def infinitely less approachable than a “less political” space, or rather it’s more for really showing off your power level and effortposting more often than not for me anyways). And introducing material dialectics, historical dialectics, etc to people even when not coating it with Marxism or leftism (but shifting people to understand the world with such a concept as a possibility/frame of reference) is praxis which then leads to the next step, this doesn’t even have to be with talks on “”“politics”“” (it always leads to it, everything is political, etc. I know- but then, it’s a sliding slope that both gets people in, but then also has to be navigated for most and def from the sounds of it for many here for their mental health, myself included). Though then there have been infinite numbers of people who pursued or are pursuing exactly just that, so is nothing new- but figured would just ramble this here since had real good chat with an IRL friend I’ve not talked to much in a long-ass while who def isn’t a commie or wasn’t even quite a leftist (probably brought her to the mindset somewhat just from talking this to remind her the broader context of her/our conditions rather than just blaming ourselves and dwelling in misery as the system promotes).

    • Water Bowl Slime@lemmygrad.ml
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      5 days ago

      Seems like the only rule on that comm is that it’s for hexbears ONLY! A strange restriction considering no one even posts there but I’m not a hexbear mod so what do I know haha

      • SadArtemis [she/her]@hexbear.netOP
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        5 days ago

        Well we can always make a non-den, even some (“no connection other than vetted or originally met from the grad”) chill space with blackjack and red guards 😎😎😎