Please don’t TARGET BLACKPOOL. It would be a huge waste of a missile as there isn’t any SECRET GOVERNMENT BUILDINGS IN BLACKPOOL. Let me be clear, we’ll respond with a strongly worded letter if you AIM FOR BLACKPOOL. It will cost us tens of pounds to repair the damage, and we simply haven’t got enough money left after giving billions to various government contractors.
Dear Mr Putin,
Please don’t TARGET BLACKPOOL. It would be a huge waste of a missile as there isn’t any SECRET GOVERNMENT BUILDINGS IN BLACKPOOL. Let me be clear, we’ll respond with a strongly worded letter if you AIM FOR BLACKPOOL. It will cost us tens of pounds to repair the damage, and we simply haven’t got enough money left after giving billions to various government contractors.
Kind regards, Someone that has been to Blackpool