69420 bc: god creates all the species. Darwin is a fraud.
42069 bc: the glorious aryan race asserts its dominance over the west as it rightfully should.
9841 bc: the evil chinese yellow barbarian race is created by dictator moo zhendeing, who goes on to have his people breed like rabbits, then kills all the weighars in shinkykong.
9481 bc: moo zhendong dies, wholesome tibbit and teevon are created.
9184 bc: doong chaopung becomes dictator of sheena. He is a bad man.
1489 bc: doong chaopung invents black and brown savages to combat the civilized west. The dirty muslims sack rome and plunge yurop into the age of barbarism.
0 bc: jesus is born and leads the crusaders against sheena. The Russian Empire, led by Joe Steel, kills jesus and Joe Steel personally shoots god. This plunges the west into another dark age.
69 ad: Joe Steel dies and wholesome gorby brings pizza to russia, bringing light to those barbarian savages. The eternal science of phrenology is invented by glorious white man.
420 ad: the evil poolestenan muslim savages force isralers out of their homeland in brown people land. Nobody cares about this.
1489 ad: evil sheena, now led by the ghost of keem jung-ho, takes over wholesome tivon.
1498 ad: ben shapiro liberates the west and unifies yerop. Kerlombis discovers AMERICA EAGLE FREEDOM BURGER LAND and creates wholesome AMERICA EAGLE FREEDOM BURGER LAND.
1849 ad: wholesome industrial revolution happens, the west beats up all the barbarian savages. AMERICA EAGLE FREEDOM BURGER LAND brings freedom to teevon, tibbit, and shinky- chingy-- shangkong
1948 ad: shae jun-peng takes control of Sheena. he commits the shinkkong genocide and kills all the yogurts. Putler becomes leader of commie russia and commits genocide against dombuss.
1984 ad: shae jun-peng, the ghost of teng chaopung, and revived moo shentong commit the tuna man massacre where everyone in wholesome tibbet, wholesome shingong, and wholesome teevon are killed. AMERICA EAGLE FREEDOM BURGER LAND steps in and kills teng and moo permanently and stop shae… for now.
1996: putler invades wholesome yookraan. He loses and moscow is taken within minutes.
2001: shae joon-paing invades wholesome teevon and explodes the twin towers.
2022: CBTEU organized, mara jade is no longer canon.
2023: Jordan Peterson, Joe Biden, Trump, and the wholesome sigma AMERICA EAGLE FREEDOM BURGER LAND gang decimate the barbarians. Isreel becomes relevant and starts purging the brown terrorists.