If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.
If you are thinking about harming yourself — get immediate crisis support. Connect to a crisis counselor 24/7, 365 days a year, from anywhere in the U.S via text, chat, or phone. The Trevor Project is 100% confidential and 100% free.
Very strangely, home life is going great. I’ve joined a new family! Last one friggin’ tried to kill me and did a piss-poor job of raising me, so having one where people talk to me and I can speak my mind and ask questions and they actually maybe even care about my life, rather than just trying to push me to make my life what they want and screw how I feel, basic decency, any kind of respect… Three decades is too long to keep treating someone like a misbehaving child! Anyway I’ve got a new name to wear, if I want 🤔 Idunno what the others with that name think about that, nor quite exactly how I feel 🤔 Hmmifications!
Went out to an extended-family partyish thingle just now. Got an odd Long Island Iced Tea! It was sour. That was odd. I liked it, though. Tried to get a Mai Tai but they didn’t have something(s) they needed for it 😅 Tried to save some of the burger and tots for later but then I accidentally ate them all @.@ Was good :3
Adulting-life isn’t so hot but hopefully it’ll work out. Some like… paperworky governmenty crap to deal with, accidentally fuxxored up a money transfer and it’s in the wrong bank and bleeegh that’ll take a minute to fix. Gotta figure out income and get my head checked and fixed and also possibly find out what if anything is wrong with my liver 😅 Gotta wait for more paperwork before I can do that, though. Too much paper up here 🤔
Online/personal-quiet-???-life is… sadness. Apparently everycritter just assumes that what I need is to be left out in the cold like nobody notices or cares that I’m missing, or why, or anything. Depressness. I hope some day I’ll have some healthy relationships and get to feel like I matter. Head’s busted, though. Hard enough to properly feel anything, then there are messes and problems and glitches and on top of that there’s the fact that hunams are very strange and I don’t belong on this planet :|
It’s kinda sickening to come back to my computer and just be like “Oh, right, I ran away 'cause nobody gives a shit and now I’m upset 'cause nobody gives a shit. Nothing left to do but sit around alone and dwell on my loneliness.”
frusses noisily :-\
So that’s where I’m at. Up here in my attic, sadness. Downstairs, new fam. Downstairs even more, phonecalls and other stress in the basement 😅 🤷
congrats on the new fam and the new name! Feeling accepted and loved for yourself is just the best feeling in life i think.