- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
- cross-posted to:
- [email protected]
- [email protected]
I know this might be a couple months old, but I didn’t know we already passed 4%.
I know this might be a couple months old, but I didn’t know we already passed 4%.
I would like to inform you why your comment’s tone was problematic cause most of the issues are not word choice, it’s structuring. Your comment intention may have been to be amiable, but to average person your comment reads as snarky and with an air of superiority. This is mainly because the comment it is replying to does not present a view with strong conviction or to argue, they stated something and happened to reveal another belief. They talk about their uptime with macos and happen to reveal they think macos is UNIX.
If you had say said “Oh you probably shouldn’t say macos is UNIX and here’s why” and then proceeded to give explicit reasons and then ended the comment, it would have ended there with many upvotes. It’s the presence of the “Well, um ashkuallyyyy…” structure in your comment along with the “That’s not how this works pal” that makes it rude. It’s like you’re shaming them for not knowing instead of seeking to inform, it’s not your usage of the word pal, it’s the argumentative negative stance. You could have ended with “I hope that helped you learn more pal!” And everything would have been fine. Positive vs negative. Structure matters. Anyway I hope that helped you learn more pal!
I’m not shaming them for not knowing, I’m shaming them for authoritatively and confidently saying something that is Apple’s PR misinformation as if it were the absolute truth in an attempt to undermine another person’s comment with blind fanboyism. They were being rude first. If you come with “Well ackhstuallym, Mac is Unix…” then a, “Well, that’s wrong.” is a reasonable response.
Gonna be very blunt here, if you mean to say that that comment is “authoritatively and confidently” saying that is misinformation to “undermine another person’s comment” I have to tell you are in a very small minority that interpret that comment that way. Most people whom OP is intending to reach would read that comment as having one claim, one anecdote, and one explanation.
The claim is “macos is stable”, the anecdote is “months of uptime” and the explanation is “powered by UNIX”. And as the main question here is whether the explanation (which I will say is presented as a fact) is said in a manner that represents authoritative blind fanboyism or a casual statement. To preface, I think it’s very clear based on my past interactions as well the upvote downvote spread that it is a casual, but factually incorrect statement. OP has experienced months of uptime and stability and attributes this to macos being UNIX under the hood.
While this is a wrong assertation, shaming is the incorrect response if the goal is to correct this misinformation. Shaming does very little to change minds and often leads to people doubling down. You will have no success with this approach. You must inform positively and confidently. Approach them from a perspective, “oh they just don’t know, let me help them.” Rather than “oh here comes the fanboy again, need to shame this guy”. The first approach has had success time and time again and builds community. I assure OP did not seek to undermine the above comment nor did they post misinformation out of blind fanboyism they merely lack knowledge and that’s how nearly everyone else in this comment chain read it.
I think just in general you may have an issue with taking things at face value and being blunt, which is not an uncommon issue. I experience this problem myself and my siblings have it worse than me though we worked past it by just learning more about language and talking to people about what they really mean when they say things. Do you happen to be neurodivergent? That’s the case for us anyway.
I didn’t shame anyone. The pal thing was a half joke. I’ve also watched this pattern before, it is not a neurodivergent thing, it’s an internet thing. When you start a comment with “No”, suddenly the comment has a tone problem. While the exact same comment would not garner any downvotes if only it started with anything else but the word no. Simply because, here’s a magic component of language, it is very hard for text to convey tone unambiguously. People can be offended and read all sorts of wrong tone. Regardless of the writer’s intention.
That said, my original comment was not meant to be shameful. It was interpreted that way, and it is ok if those who happened to read it at the time chose to interpret it that way. I don’t care about downvotes really and it doesn’t faze me emotionally in any way. But it is an interaction that would not have caused any sort of inconvenience face to face. “Mac is Unix”, “What? No, it isn’t because…” “Oh, ok” But I do agree that on the internet you have to do a peace dance before correcting people. Otherwise you are the one who will be ostracized for bad tone. You want bad tone? go read Linus Torvalds chat logs, then you’ll read a veritable asshole over text on full swing.