If you’re game for a lot of setup, you might like Tdarr

It supports remote workers for encoding, so you can store your stuff on the server but still use the main computer’s hw accel.

Because one company would have a monopoly.

Also if you don’t have anchovies, you can punch up a sauce in much the same way with fish sauce. Its probably not identical to using actual anchovies but it’s much easier to keep in a pantry.

Just wanted to say thanks for putting the caveat in the title, it’s nice to not have to go digging for the bigger picture :)