• HurlingDurling@lemm.ee
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    1 year ago

    Honestly, it’s missing the following gems…

    “We are looking for an industry leading ninja…”

    “We’re a work hard, play hard team/company”

    • FullOfBallooons
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      1 year ago

      I would also add any sort of variation of “at this job, we’re like a family!”

      • Urbanfox@lemmy.world
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        1 year ago

        I joined a " we are family" company and got shouted at by the founder because I wasn’t a mind reader and didn’t do something I had no idea needed done.

        Sounds exactly like family, except I was hired into the position of toddler.

        Fuck that noise.

        • FuglyDuck@lemmy.world
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          1 year ago

          I’m reminded of this guy I fired after he ghosted me when he no-call-no-showed.

          “Wait? You don’t treat everyone like family?”
          “No. I treat everyone like employees.” The look on his face was kinda priceless.

          (For the record, I do try to take care of my employees, and the minimum there is paying what they’re worth- but the relationship is definitely employer-employee. The relationship is inherently transactional; pretending otherwise is exploitation)

    • billwashere@lemmy.world
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      1 year ago

      “Industry leading ninja” is so cringey. It’s like a very out of touch old guy trying sound relevant. I AM an old guy so I have some knowledge here. 😀

      • funkless_eck@sh.itjust.works
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        1 year ago

        Ninja, literally, “invisible”, or perhaps generously, “spy” is such an insane term for a business to use anyway.

        It connotates someone who is willing to break the law - kill if necessary- to bring down the opposition. Not someone connecting a new API node for Slack notifications

        They probably actually mean Stakhanovite, but wouldn’t bring themselves to use a communist term (/s).