Went through my mail that’s been accumulating for too long and found a birthday card addressed to my deadname from my stepdad’s parents. Which means that they haven’t been updated that I’ve transitioned, despite publicly coming out on social media almost two years ago.

And if they care enough to send me a birthday card I would have come up in conversation at least once. They couldn’t just give them an update on my name under such circumstances? Does my mom really expect me to personally tell everyone I tangentially know, but never really speak to, and have an in-depth conversation about gender-identity and why I’ve transitioned before she’s willing to acknowledge my transness in front of them?

I have no real desire or intention of making them a major part of my life. I don’t have their phone numbers, and I have not interacted with them in over two years. It is not my responsibility to update them. It is my mom’s responsibility to refer to me as my proper identity when I’m not around.

I should not have to deal with this shit this far into my transition.