semi- Serious question, Idon’t get it. Most of us get why the hegemonic gender system is stupid, why subscribe to the binary role you were assigned? Also, why do straight people exist? Maybe it’s just me but I like to look and feel like my own perception of what is attractive.

    • QueerCommie@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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      4 months ago

      I’m mostly joking

      Edit: to elaborate, people sometimes naively ask this of trans people, so I thought it would be interesting to observe if the shoe was on the other foot. Now, this may seem like King Charles II’s request for an explanation for why a dead fish is heavier than a living one, but there is still a tiny bit of reason involved. The one I could come up with is just with the social construction of gender it is far easier to be normative if it doesn’t go against your being. I imagine it would be easier for people to experiment and go beyond current constraints comfortably in a communist post-gender society, but for now it’s not too hard for most to conform (beyond the obvious pain caused by the double edged sword of patriarchy).

  • Thordros [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    4 months ago

    I was born this way. That’s the only explanation anybody should need. Mix up the variables in the question, and the answer is still the same.

    My son was born feeling like a man. Doesn’t matter that he was born with female bits. We live in a world where science can reconcile that. He’s him. Simple as.

  • Franfran2424@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    “why are you gay?” vibes. clown question, sorry.

    People are the way they are, and thats it. Especially leftists, you aren’t going to surprise them with the “gender is a social construct” thing. They are what they have decided to be.

    • Catfish [she/her]@lemmygrad.ml
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      4 months ago

      You have missed the entire joke because you were too busy being upset that the questions asked to trans people were turned onto cis people.

      • Franfran2424@lemmygrad.ml
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        4 months ago

        No leftist has ever asked “why are you trans?” in the way it’s been framed here by OP.

        Non leftists do that kind of unpolite questions, but I would expect a leftist trans person to not copy non leftist impolite behavior when dealing with leftists.

        It’s a bad joke tbh. Also in the wrong sub for jokes

        • QueerCommie@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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          4 months ago

          Where have I been impolite? As someone on the internet, you should know that most things are a mix between satire and seriousness. I simply flipped the stupid trans question onto cis people for giggles and because I was interested in what people could come up with. I do not mean to suggest that cis people shouldn’t exist, just that if we must justify ourselves then so should you. (Almost) Everything has a reason, even if it’s just “it happened to be this way by circumstance.”

    • QueerCommie@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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      4 months ago

      I didn’t choose my gender but there’s still a reason I’m non-binary. I learned that gender was bs and realized I never strongly associated with being a dude and didn’t want to grow up to be seen as such by others.

  • AmarkuntheGatherer@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    This is a misconception. Cis people don’t choose their gender, nor do heteros their sexuality. All babies are born genderfluid bisexual. When they start teething, gender and sexuality fairies arrive and make the baby into something else. Babies too fabulous for heterosexuality are made homosexual. If the sexuality fairy doesn’t visit a baby, but they just love everyone so much, they can’t distingush someone[s] they particularly like to limit their love to, they end up identifying as asexual.

    I know the gender fairy visited me, we have pictures and everything, but I not sure about the sexuality fairy. I’m told they arrived, but I’ve seen evidence they were elsewhere at the time.

  • DamarcusArt@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    Because I like BEER and WOMEN and ARM-WRESTLING and other MANLY things and I am definitely not COMPENSATING for any insecurities by performing a heteronormative role in society in a desperate attempt to fit in!

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    4 months ago

    I guess the most honest answer is I was conditioned to act and look like a man and I’m mostly fine with that I guess, I don’t feel like acting or looking much different would be better for me.

    I know the binary gender roles are made up bullshit and I roll my eyes when people around me say shit like “women are inherently this or men are inherently that” but I also don’t feel the need to really change my entire personality because of this realization except for like quitting the toxic masculinity bullshit I was conditioned to reproduce.

    • QueerCommie@lemmygrad.mlOPM
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      4 months ago

      zoidberg salute 2

      Tbc, I’m for gender abolition, not people being like “I like pink so I guess I have to change my gender.”

  • comradecalzone@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    Maybe it’s just me but I like to look and feel like my own perception of what is attractive.

    I don’t think that anyone’s preferences or identity is any less genuinely theirs just because they were influenced by culture. Moreover, what we find attractive can vary greatly from person to person, even within the binary norm.

  • shreddingitlater [he/him, comrade/them]@hexbear.net
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    I’ve never had an issue with the gender I was assigned and have never felt compelled to think about it until I started to understand gender as a social construct. Even after that though, WRT my own identity, I’ve thought about it as much as I care to and concluded everytime that, no, I really do feel most comfortable as what I was told I was from birth. I’m bi, not hetero though.

  • CicadaSpectre@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    I’m AMAB and never felt any other way than masculine. I’m also straight because that’s just what I’m attracted to. I was never raised to subscribe to gender roles by my family, and I’ve never thought people ought to. I know now that gender is a social construct, but I still choose to identify as such because it’s just what I am - what I feel to be. I don’t think it’s all that different to how my trans and NB friends choose to identify; only that society treats me better for it, which is a tragedy.

    I don’t really feel duped or forced into this. I don’t feel unnatural just because how I identify lines up with how I “should” identify according to my country.

  • destroyamerica@lemmygrad.ml
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    4 months ago

    idk, im just pretty comfy as I am (cishet man)? I feel no dysphoria, and I like having “masculine” traits. If society magically changed to where gender didn’t really exist tomorrow (or hell, if what I present as is now seen as “feminine”) I dont think it would bother me. Pretty much the same thing for being straight, I like people who look “feminine”, and I’m not attracted to penises. I’m sure at least some of this is cultural stuff, but then again I’m not sure any of this would be possible to change about myself so I’m not sure if that matters?

    edit: another thought, I’d love to read answers from anyone here on lemmygrad or hexbear whose native language isn’t gendered in anyway, like not even with pronouns, to see if that has any effect on your thoughts on this.